It's been a very long time since I have made a new post here on my blog.
Today, I want to share that the Japan-Philippines love story is now over. I have found out things about my partner that I cannot accept as of now like: past wrongdoings, past lovers, age difference and the fact that his priority is to his family (pamangkins, sisters, etc) and not to me. I feel like I've been used. It's hard to admit but I must say that I still love him, but the two of us should never be together again. It wasn't easy. After all, he was my first gay lover.
Even though there is anger and resentment, I also feel thankful. Thankful because through him, the doors of the discreet community here in Davao had slowly been opening its doors for me.
Through him, I met one of the most good-looking and maya friends of mine. As I can recall, there are only two gay friends that I have been sharing my life stories with. Two people only know the craziness and exciting things that I've been doing as a gay man.. I don't know if I can still be considered as a closet, knowing that I have told two people about my secrets. . Let's call him Kristoff for now. You can view his picture by clicking this link: Kristoff's PIC
Plenty of gay men are now messaging me on facebook. Requesting me for my number, a date at expensive restaurants, a movie hangout, chill at the beach. etc.. but all of these invitations, I have strictly denied.
I know some of them are not that bad. Some are even boyfriend material. "Yung pwede mong madala sa mall na bf.. Mga ganun".. There were plenty of opportunities.. But I closed doors.
I don't know what's really happening to me nowadays.. Especially since I've also observed that I have been addicted to sensual massages no matter what cost, and no matter what the masseur looked like.
Oh and yeah. I've been hired. I am now a gay man with a job. Kudos to me! :)
That's all. I hope someone's still reading this.
PS: Friendly advice, I think that it may also help for closets to have at least one friend who knows. Trust me. I am talking from experience,. It can really reduce the heavy feeling inside. :)
Love you all. Ta ta.
